My rejected thoughts

Your awesome Tagline

32,354 notes

fukkkres:

white mom: quit roughhousing!

white son: fuck u mom

white mom: oh heavens! thomas are you going to let your son talk to his mother like that?

white dad: go to your room billy right this minute!

white son: fuck u both *goes to room and jacks off and smokes weed out of mountain dew can*

(via thefuuuucomics)

161,384 notes

Nice things to whisper when hugging someone

buckyraccoon:

yogurtville:

-you smell different when you’re awake
-please help me (then smile as if nothing happened)
-soon
-you have lovely skin, I can’t wait to wear it
-your hair tastes like strawberries
-tonight….you.
-he knows, don’t go home.
-I always knew you would die in my arms
-every time I poop I think of you
-no one will ever believe you
-yessssssssssssss
-I killed mufasa
-I bet you didn’t feel me lick your ear
-mother told me it would be like this

-hail hydra

(via perceptionof-reality)